The crossbow man cometh !

Amongst the English upper classes it has always been the tradition to send the fool of the family into a career within the church. The simple minded younger son would be despatched away to become a humble and harmless village rector or padre. They would live a benign life of religious study and piety, bringing spiritual solace to the working masses.
My uncle Corneilius was such a man. A simple minded buffoon who toiled lovingly for many years in his country parish with a deep evangelical fervour, doing good and kindly deeds and spreading the holy word.
Corneilius was normally a timid, shy and reserved fellow. Sadly however his amiable and gentle personality changed when under the influence of the demon drink. He was a secret alcoholic ! When intoxicated by the demon booze his personality and character would change beyond all recognition. He would act like an uncouth lout, he would swear, he become vile and boisterous and worse of all he became dangerously aggressive and psychotic.
When drunk he would prowl around his village armed with a crossbow. He had a passionate hatred of cats and would hunt down and viciously kill the dearly loved pet cats of his parisheners.
No cat was safe, be it the pedigree prize winning felines of the affluent to the dirt encrusted flee bitten moggies of the poor and destitute. He would not rest until every cat in the village was slain !
When Corneilius awoke sober the next morning after one of his drunken murderous orgies he would be contrite with self loathing and remorse. He would be apoleptic and swear on the good book never to do it again, sadly he would always relapse and once more go on a barbaric feline killing spree.

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One nil to Lord Dimblem !